Pride Comes Before a Fall

A few weeks ago I was cocky, downright smug... I had seen some things and was feeling pretty good about myself and about my relationship, kids and life. I even remember thinking 'pride comes before a fall'... but I took no heed. I found myself somewhere, they would never have gone, few people would have been so stupid...

And soon enough I find myself being humbled... It really hurts you know. To see yourself as you are, so see your own fault and failings ... to have the finger pointed at you and after my anger fades to be able to whisper ... oh it's true! How pathetic, how vile, and to look into loving eyes hurt and the importance of my own rights and hurts fade...


To see that they (the hurts) are not as important as they felt, that I am not so important at I have any right to make him feel like that. I thought I was the victim, and then I saw I was the perpetrator...

And then this is real love that comes and holds me anyway, and exhausted we despair, that we didn't look to Jesus, the Prince of Peace, that we didn't look to him.

In the words of the old hymn...

"O what peace we often forfeit, O what needless pain we bear,
All because we do not carry everything to God in prayer."

It was a terrible night, one of our worst, but yet somehow today has yet been sweet, theres healing still to happen and wounds that would have been better to have never been made, but I am so thankful for the power of forgiveness and the fact that we both could so quickly enter into that!

And the good thing about trouble, is that what you have suffered for, you don't easily let go of. I trust that this experience, while we would never have chosen it, will bind us closer together, strengthening our bond. (but it's a fine line and you don't want to dance too close to that edge!)